Returning to Work

Returning to work after the loss of a baby can be incredibly difficult. Grief can make it hard to focus, think clearly, or move through the day the way you normally would.

The Joyful Morning has a podcast episode on "Returning to Work after a Stillbirth": https://www.themorning.com/blog/episode02

Coworkers who don’t know about your loss may ask how your baby is doing. Others who do know may gently ask how you’re holding up. Even when these questions come from a place of care, they can feel like sudden grief triggers—hitting you like a ton of bricks when you’re simply trying to get through the workday. Many parents worry about becoming overwhelmed or breaking down at work.

At the same time, you may want people at work to know about your loss without having to share the news yourself. Some parents prefer that colleagues are aware so they can be mindful and supportive. Others want coworkers to feel comfortable acknowledging their baby if and when they are ready to talk.

Some parents find it helpful to write a note to a manager or trusted colleague, asking them to share their wishes with the rest of the team. This can help communicate your boundaries and reduce the pressure of having to explain your loss repeatedly.

A template like the one below may help you express what feels right for you: 

     "As I return to work, I wanted to share that I recently experienced the heartbreaking loss of my baby. While I'm grateful to be back, I'm still navigating my grief and healing.


     I know many of you care and may want to offer support, and I truly appreciate your kindness. At this time, I would prefer not to discuss my loss during work hours. Keeping conversations focused on work will help me ease back into my routine and do my best each day.

     Please don't interpret my quietness or boundaries as a lack of appreciation. Your understanding, patience, and compassion mean more than you know.

     Thank you for respecting my privacy and supporting me as I return to work."